Checkmate

Its twelve minutes past midnight

If this was yesterday I would be wishing you a lovely night

After a six hour long conversation spanning every silly topic that would cross our minds

But no, today is not yesterday,today is today

And today I lay on my bed exhausted from being insecure although paranoid would be a better choice of word

For six hours now all that’s crossed my mind is how you are having “our” routine with someone who’s not me

Maybe you found someone you can have mature conversation with

Not that I wasn’t mature myself,you just never let me be mature

Today I lay in bed waiting for tomorrow

And not because tomorrow you’ll call,or maybe text

I have a feeling you won’t

Am waiting for tomorrow to see whether I’ll still lay in bed and keep feeling jealous

Am waiting for tomorrow to prove to myself that I can live without our routine

Am waiting for tomorrow to prove to myself that I can readjust my routine

To prove to me that I can check you out of my routine

I lay in my bed waiting for tomorrow

Waiting for the tomorrow when I’ll finally be able to say

checkmate